Pray for Rain

Poem by Zhang Zongchang, a Chinese warlord of the early 20th century known as the "Dogmeat General."

The sky god is also named Zhang
Why does he make life hard for me
If it doesn't rain in three days
I'll demolish your temple
Then I'll have cannons bombard your mom.

Wikipedia:

Zhang kept some 30 to 50 concubines of different nationalities, including Koreans, Japanese, White Russians, French and Americans, who were given numbers since he could not remember their names nor speak their language. He was free with his gifts, lavishly squandering money and concubines on superiors and friends. As a result, his commanders were very loyal to him, contributing to his military success. According to the wife of Wellington Koo:

Zhang Zongchang was also known for writing poetry, though his works are generally considered to be quite bad. However, some sources have disputed these poems as being fabrications made by his political opponent Han Fuju to slander Zhang Zongchang.

Zhang was known everywhere as the "Three Don't Knows". He said he didn't know how much money he had, how many concubines, or how many men in his army.