The Elixir of Humbug

An ad in the Farragut North Metro station. I suppose the people who put this up would say that it is ironic and everybody knows drinking pomegranate juice won't help you live forever, but really there is a whole discourse in America built on the assumption that immortality is just a matter of living correctly. Like medieval alchemists or Tang Dynasty shamans, modern health nuts think they have found the magic formula.

I once sat next to a woman on the train who was reading a glossy magazine article in which they described the diets and exercise routines of three young women and asked a panel of experts which one would live the longest.

The one who doesn't get run over by a truck, I remember thinking. Or the one with the best genes for longevity. Or something else entirely beyond her control. Obviously a healthy diet and some amount of exercise are good for you, but regardless of how many spinach shakes you down or marathons you run, you are going to die, and your lifespan is only marginally under your control.